Posts Tagged ‘humorous’

“What do “teenage-lovestory-themed” telenovelas teach televiewers, especially teenagers?”

First thing, hindi ako si Antonietta from Bubble Gang.  Ako si Joshua Canlas and nobody’s Joshua Canlas, ako lang.  Second thing, I have my own style. You won’t hear me na gumagamit ng mga katagang, “Nangyayari bay an sa totoong buhay, Amnesia?” at “Pinapaniwala niyo ang mga televiewers na…” Tsaka masyadong mataray si Antonietta. May puso parin naman ako.

Let’s go down to the business. In this article, we shall list down some of the “perceived” negative things teenagers can learn from “teenage-lovestory-themed” telenovelas. I just coined that term. Let us begin listing down:

1. Suwayin ang mga magulang ng dahil sa infatuation or immature love.

“Ma, nagmamahalan kami. Hindi ko gusting masaktan ka, pero kung hindi mo siya matanggap, wala akong ibang magagawa kundi ang suwayin ka.”

2. Matutong maglayas at subukang magpaka-independent ng dahil din sa immature love na iyon.

“Patawarin mo ako, Pa. Pero kung hindi mo kayang tanggapin ang relasyon nami, I guess I have no other option but to leave this family.”

“Kahit ano’ng trabaho gagawin ko kumita lang.”

3. Commonly, “kiss-and-tell” ang mga teenage-lovers. Pero iba ang tinuturo ng telenovelas, “TELL-AND-KISS.” How?

“Mahal kita. Sana mahal mo rin ako.”

“Oo, mahal din kita.”

Next scene:

Dahan-dahang maglalapit ang mga mukha, and guess what, magdidikit ang mga labi.

MOMENT NAMIN TOH!!! Kissing-kissing…

4. Telenovelas introduce the idea of “Survival of the Flirtest” (and maybe also the fittest).

Ayoko na mag-quote ng mga lines na ginagamit sa mga telenovelas. The Borrowed Wife, The Temptation of Wife, The Legal Wife, My Neighbor’s Wife (basta lahat ng may WIFE, kahit hindi teen-themed you mga iyan, same effect lang din).  May isa pa, My Husband’s Lover.

😛

Basically, the objective is to win over the wife or the husband of the other person. Agawan, kabitan, pasikatan, pagandahan, paseksihan, pamachuhan. Iyun na nga yun. Ano? Explain ko pa? Wag na.

5. Fornication (k.dot)

6. Bestfriend of the bida is always left behind, often neglected.  Friendzoned lagi, kumbaga.  Oo nga, friendzoned. Hanggang doon lang! Ano? Kumbinsido ka na?

“May tatanggap pa kaya sakin maliban sa kanya?  Kung magkakahiwalay kami, mag-isa na lang ulit ako.”

“Hindi ka naman talaga nag-iisa eh. Makakahanap ka parin ng lalake (o babae) na kaya kang tanggapin at handa kang mahalin.”

“Tanggapin, oo. Pero ang mahalin, Malabo yata yun.”

“Malay mo nandyan lang yung taong nakatakda pa sa’yo. Ayaw mo lang bigyan ng pagkakataon.”

“Siguro nga… Ahh sige, mauna na ko.”

-_-

(ano’ng ka-kornihan toh?)

7. Initially, friendzoned si bestfriend. In the end, friendzoned pa rin.  

Mukhang ayaw talaga ng mga writers na magkatuluyan si bestfriend at si bida ah.  Si bida, lagi napupunta sa bagong kakilala lang at never kay bestfriend na matagal ng kakilala. Ano ba yan?  (so ano ba talagang pinaglalaban ko?)

8.  Betrayal or pagtataksil. Pagkasira ng friendship.

“Akala ko ba bestfriend tayo? Hindi ko alam na pati pala sa boyfriend ko, gusto mong makihati.”

“Pare naman, pati ba naman girlfriend ko? Hindi ka pa ba masaya sa meron ka?”

9. Pagpapaka-martir. I shall call this “Kagome-Syndrome.”

“Alam kong hindi ako ang gusto mo. Tanggap ko yun. Ang mahalaga sakin ay Makita kang nakangiti. Yung lagi kang masaya. Kaya mananatili lang ako sa tabi mo.  Hindi ko alam kung ano pa ang kaya kong ibigay sa’yo, pero handa ako.”

-Kagome to InuYasha

Well, I quoted that from an anime scene. Pero maraming telenovelas ang gumagamit ng ganyang script.

Syado eksena ni Kagome, nabasted na nga, na-friendzoned pa.  At hanep, hindi pa nakuntento, trip pang magpaka-martir.  Pakibatukan nga yung kaibigan mong may ganitong sakit, “Kagome-Syndrome.”

Iyan ang ilang sa mga medyo negative things na maaaring matutunan ng mga teenagers sa “teenage-lovestory-themed” telenovelas.  Ayoko na magpakahaba pa ng aking speech. Basta, let us be aware na lang.  It’s okay to be entertained by watching those telenovelas.  Pero yung sobra kang maapektuhan at isabuhay na yung mga napapanood mo, na-a-ah, that’s totally wrong.  Mali. Wrong. Hindi mainam. Not good.

Napaka-antagonistic ko naman kung puro sa negative things ako naka-focus. Next time, we shall list down some of the things we, teenagers, can learn from those, as I coined, “teenage-lovestory-themed” telenovelas.

I would like to thank my supporters out of nowhere.  Kung sinuman kayo at nasan man kayo, just stay there. I mean, keep on supporting me.

For any possible responses, ode magkoment kayo o kaya i-message niyo ko. Tss…

-_-

”Ways on How To Become an Honor Student, The Twisted Way!”

Hahaha! This is so crazy. As in, TWISTED again. I’ve graduated from high school with academic awards. I was really expecting for those awards because I worked hard for them. C’mon, it is not being “mayabang” (arrogant or boastful), I am just so proud with my achievements. I know, there are still more people who are far better than me (Well, I don’t care about that!).

High school is just a small place. I am now preparing myself to venture to a new journey. COLLEGE. Hayzt! I am going to love college because I know that it will offer me more challenging situations, hideous and mind-boggling problems. College will make you more responsible, competent and smart student (Does it still matter? Why am I talking in that manner? I don’t know!). I am here, just waiting for that time to come. FIRST DAY OF COLLEGE. At high school, I graduated with honors. At college, I will be a dean’s lister (there is nothing bad with dreaming, especially if you know that you can achieve those dreams). Haha!

Going back with my main topic. How did I become an honor student (at high school)? Well, let us start by reminiscing the past. When I was at my 1st and 2nd year of high school, I was not fond of studying. I was graduating from one level to another without having any award. Here’s the weird thing, I really don’t know on how I graduated with those levels because I know that I didn’t study well. I got failing grades, I admit it. That’s why I am wondering. Well, so much for reminiscing the past.

Here are some tips to become an honor student (The Twisted way!):

1) Be good with your teachers even if you don’t want them. Always give a very big smile. Always make a good impression about teachers to follow this tip. This one is really funny. I did it. I admit. Be good with your teachers even if you don’t want them. Be good with them even if you want to kill them, flush them in the toilet, make them a half-rotten meat or throw them into the river for being so strict about what you are doing (Isn’t it nice? Haha…It’s gross). Just be good with them. Your HIGH grades are at their hands. Sometimes, be a tupperware (Or be a plastic!). Inside the school, your attitudes dictate your grades. If you possess a character that your teacher doesn’t want, change it. Show him or her that you are changing and you will be liked. Good grades will follow. Am I so bad? I think not. It is just the reality.

2) Be a good follower of your teachers. Darling, this one is so true. To have the grades that you should have to become an honor student, you should obey your teachers. When your teacher asks you to do anything, obey him or her without any sign of hesitation. Obey your teacher with your eye twinkling like the stars and always wear a very big smile. Haha! This step is really effective. Yes, sometimes it is difficult to follow because they will always ask you something to do even if academically not related with your grades. They will always look for you because they know that you will follow them truthfully, honestly and happily. C’mon, darling. Your labor will never be in vain. At the end, you will get high grades. Sometimes, being a “katulong or alalay type” of student can help you on the way.

3) Always present yourself at any school activities. Hmm! If you want extra credits, why don’t you join those school activities, clubs and organizations? That one is so effective. Even if you don’t have the guts to be a leader or just a follower, JUST PRETEND YOU HAVE. Haha! Extra points will be given to you at the end of the school year. You will have the grades that you are not expecting. C’mon! You are not after the popularity from the students or from the teachers; you are after for your high grades. So, what are you waiting for? Stand up, get out from the couch that you are sitting and look for the nearest registration outlet.

4) Put a little creativity on your projects. This is true. Put a little, just a little creativity on your projects. Put a little color. Spend money to design your projects. This can give you more points. Why? For example, your project doesn’t have any content or a failing grade is not enough for it. Your teacher will think, “Ipasa ko na nga toh, may effort naman sa design, eh.” (I think I will pass this kid, there’s an A for the effort to design.) See! Extra credit again.

These steps are just some that I did to become an honor student at my high school life. Sometimes, it is so hard to follow these tips because you may think, “Am I really getting some credits from what I am doing?”. C’mon, if you really want to become an honor student, well then, do everything, even pretending to be good when you\re really not. It is just the matter of choice. You will benefit from it, promise!

Guys, don’t misinterpret me. I love my teachers. I expressed to them the sweetest words that my whole being could express. I respected them, I’m loyal to them, I obeyed. Now, I am giving the greatest gratitude to them. I know that I can see higher because I am standing at the shoulders of the giants that taught me to be responsible, competent and transformational member of the society.

At high school, maybe it was 70-30. Bigger percent that I showed at high school was true, the truest of me. The smaller percent was just a big pretending. These steps were really effective. You know, the best step is, “Get your butt off the bed and study your lessons!” Study, study, study. Follow these steps or not, it’s just the matter of your choice.

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Think first before reacting on this note. First of all, the title of this note is, “Ways on How To Become an Honor Student, The Twisted Way!”. The Twisted Way! That is actually the style of my creative writing. In my notes, I express there the pumping irony of life (ang kabalintunan ng buhay), the unrealistic part of life that can be realistic, the impossible that can be possible. I love creating essays about the irony of life because you can get the humor by exaggerating them, so it is funny! In this note, I explained the irony of life of an ordinary student who wants to be one of the honors. In my note, I am not dwelling with just my life; I am dwelling with it generally. These steps are sometimes the strategies of most students (not actually just myself). What I am telling here is that, good character is actually the primary basis of the good grades, academic aspect is just secondary. In my note, I am just having it so exaggerated to say that you have to be a plastic to be liked by most, that is why it’s the PUMPING IRONY OF LIFE. That is my style of writing. EXPLAINING THE IRONY AND HYPERBOLE OF LIFE. The reality of life.

“Pledge of Loyalty”

(date written : March 19, 2011)

It’s Thursday, the 31st of March. I’m Joshua, and this is Youth Report live from the COLM Quadrangle. Wait, why am I speaking like that? Why am I wearing this? Why am I standing in front of these beautiful and handsome people? And, what is this occasion? Wait, wait, I should think. Oh, it’s our Graduation Day. I’m so silly. All of us have waited for this day. This is the fruit of all of our hard works. Let me tell you this, “Graduation is the time of completion of one level and moving up to the next level. At this moment, the important graduation is the high school graduation where we, the graduates are honored with a degree or a diploma as a proof that we have successfully completed this school year.” Well, so much for that.

Three years has gone so fast. When we first arrived here at school, when we were 2nd year students, we thought that we already know something in life or we know almost all. We thought that we don’t need more advices. We’re wrong. We know nothing, our teachers helped us realized that we have nothing with our own. At first, it was very difficult for as to unite as one class. We were from different schools, different cultures and different families of course. Those differences were hindrances at first in able for us to change for the better. Our teachers didn’t give up with just because of that. Instead, they used those differences as instruments to bridge-up our different worlds. It was a very long story. Now, we know that we’re emptied, we admitted it. We are now the students that are ready to be filled-up with more know knowledge.

II – Mt. Mayon, I can describe you as, “Puro gala, a year filled with fun and excitement.”

Tugudugguduggud… Can I hear some drum rolls? Our third year life offered us many “pahirap”. Nuknukan ng dami ang mga project na kailangan gawin. There were times that we are not sleeping over night to finish our projects and to pass them on time. Gala moments were limited. We really needed to focus with our studies. That was actually what the school is all about—to study hard. Studying hard helped me a lot. Look where I am standing now. I am standing at shoulders of the giants that taught me all of the stuffs that I know.

III – Australia, “Less gala and fun but more knowledge and hard works.”

Huhuhu… I think I will burst out to tears. After this graduation, I am not anymore a IV – Hope student. Wait, who says I cannot? I can always bring those with memories in my heart. I will graduate from high school but not from being a IV – Hope student. This year, many doors have opened for us. One was, when our school joined the BULPRISA Meet and some of the participants were from IV – Hope, including me. Haha! We thought that third year was the hardest year for us but we’re wrong. The hardest was the last. We had a long week with not enough sleep, gosh! But, it’s okay. We’re done with that. We are now here at final ceremony—The Graduation.

IV – Hope, “Very less gala and fun and excitement but more and more doors, knowledge and hard works.”

We have come to the final stage. I think, I have stated so much.

The real score is this day is our achievement and an achievement for the school, achievement of our teachers. They fulfilled the vision statement of the school, “College of Our Lady of Mercy is home of holistically formed student and community leaders.” They achieved it, they have not failed. They gave everything, sacrificed everything—time, money, knowledge and their heart. Words are not enough to state the things you have done for us but there are so many other ways to express our gratitude to all of the people who molded us this way.

Nobody is perfect in this world, we all know that. But if we keep on doing the good deeds, we will surely become successful. That’s why our teachers are successful in life. I am a student of this school for already three years that’s why I will have the pledge of loyalty.

With all those stuffs that I said, I will promise one thing. I will be loyal to the school. “Loyalty means allegiance permeated with strong and enthusiastic feeling or sentiment. It means loyalty to loved ones; loyalty to superiors; loyalty to constituted authority; loyalty, solid and indivisible, to the country.”

With being loyal, I have a part of this school. I have the objective of obligation. “It is said that if you remove the spirit of loyalty from the members of a command, the unit will collapse like a house of cards.”

I will quote a thought from Elbert Hubbard, The Loyalty Pledge,

“If you work for a man,
in heaven’s name work for him.
Speak well of him
And stand by the institution he represents.
Remember, an ounce of loyalty
is worth a pound of cleverness.
If you must growl, condemn
And eternally find fault,
Why, resign your position.
And when you are on the outside,
Damn to your heart’s content.
But as long as you’re part of that institution,
do not condemn it.
For if you do, the first high wind that comes along
will blow you away.
And probably, you will never why.”

At this moment, I am requesting the graduates to stand and raise their right hand as a sign of promise as we are going to have our Pledge of Loyalty.

We, the graduates of the College of Our Lady of Mercy promise to uphold the dignity, honor and prestige of our school. We will shine more beyond the school walls and will prove that we learned by heart the wisdom and values taught to us in order that we shall turn to be worthy citizens of our country.

We will love our country, the Philippines. We will do our best to become a good Filipino citizen and will be loyal to the cause of our country. We want our country to be ever free and independent and we want our fellow citizens to be ever free and prosperous. When we leave the portals of our Alma Mater, we will work harder and save more, live longer and serve our country joyfully.

We believe in a good strong and fair government. As a citizen, it is our duty to share the load of sacrifice, burden and responsibility. We will turn ourselves from bad vices, obey the law and help the government officials to implement and enforce the law. We will do our best to become an honest, self-supporting and serviceable citizen.

We will always love peace but we will fight for the sake of the right, of the freedom and of the justice. We love our lives but we will gladly die for the sake of our family, our fellow citizen and our God.

As we graduate from the school, we will not condemn the school because we are part of it. We will defend the rights and privileges of the school as sons and daughters of our Alma Mater.

So help us God.

(express your comments and suggestions to improve this one! thank you!)

It’s good to know that other people can realize things you are doing for them. Even if sometimes, dealing with the situation is very difficult or brain-busting. It is also good to know when your sacrifices are not worthless and they are for the greater good. I hate it because I am having so much drama right now(that is not my style in writing!) .  I love to work especially when it is appreciated.

This day,  March 15, 2011, I did a very tiring job and I still need to do it until tomorrow.  I need to teach 4 sections ( 4 classrooms) in our school for their speech choir.  It is actually not my job but I need to do it because of the situation.  Our English teachers were not there because they were busier than me (they were in a very important meeting) . I am exhausted because I am handling 4 sections, I cannot teach them at the same time that’s why I need to transfer from one room to another.  After I teach one stanza for this section, I will go on the other section.  So tiring.  I am not reclamizing (reclamizing? Is that complaining?  Oh yes!) .  I am not complaining, I am just telling you what I feel right now.  I’m tired, sleepy, my head is aching, I’m exhausted.  I am just not in the mood.  Hayz!  Oh, I remember, if you are doing something for others and it is totally voluntary, don’t complain about it.  You accepted it and did it, you know that there’s something in return.  You don’t know specifically what is that thing but you definitely know there is.  It is not actually about the THING itself, but the thing outside it.  Why does that person gave you that thing?  Because you are appreciated, that’ s it.  No matter how big or small the thing that person gave to you, the point is, you are appreciated.  (more thing, thing, thing!  Does it matter?  I don’t know!)

Maybe, I still need to do those things because I am the president of our English Club (does it matter? I don’t know!) .  Even though, I can’t stand it.  No!  I mean. I can stand it because I am still here, in front of my computer and expressing my thoughts (duh!) .  Does it really matter?  I don’t know and I actually don’t care.  Good thing that I am just so happy with my life.  I am gaining the kind of respect that I deserve (i guess…).  THIS IS GOTTA BE A GOOD LIFE!

This is so cool. My legs are shaking. My head is terribly aching. I’m falling to my unconsciousness and I can’t help it. It’s too weird for a teenager like me to conquer the everyday of my life even if I am only having a 5 hour sleep each night and I don’t have the chance to sleep at day because I am so busy doing many school stuffs. It is so cool that I am here, in front of the computer and blogging again. Haha!

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I should save this as a draft, it’s actually not yet done.

haha!